It's my last night home for the next many, many few months, and as tired as I am, I really don't want to fall asleep. It's 1.43am, past midnight so well, today is the day. But I just don't want to wake up and have that realisation and let it sink in. Because you know, when you haven't slept, it still feels it's part of one day eventhough it's past midnight. I really, really don't wanna go back. I know I'm going to be okay but I know the first few days, weeks maybe, are going to be tough, having to readjust. Most importantly, I'm worried about some other things- things that I hope are going to be okay.

I feel like I've more to lose this time round, and I'm scared.